Grand Gestures
by crysbit
Summary: Oz has decided he has to leave to learn to control his wolf, but can he really leave Willow?


Disclaimer & Author's Note: Obviously I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or any characters. I will not profit from this story in any way and wrote it simply for my own enjoyment, and hopefully for the enjoyment of other fans of the show.

This takes place at the end of the episode "Wild at Heart". I'm going to assume that everyone reading this knows exactly what happened, since this is the heartbreaker episode when Oz left Willow to go off and figure out how to live with the wolf side of himself. This story picks up just after Oz walks out the door. It's a one-shot for now, but I'd be willing to continue if there was any interest.

* * *

Oz wasn't one for grand gestures, preferring a more laid-back approach, but there were always exceptions. In his case those exceptions were almost always called Willow Rosenberg, a beguiling redhead with the sweetest smile he'd ever seen. In all their time together he'd taken a bullet in the arm for her, pulled angry vamps off her, put himself between her and the _danger du jour_, and appointed himself as her personal protector. All to see that smile that she saved just for him, the one that lit up the room and made him feel like they were the only two people in the world.

Of course, he was having a hard time picturing that smile now as he sat alone in his van. His mind kept replaying the anguished look on her face as he told her that he was leaving. She had actually asked if he loved her. Oz's shoulders slumped in despair. That one question had nearly broken him. She doubted him, she doubted his love for her, and he had no one to blame but himself. All his life, he'd never loved anyone else. He'd told her so, kissed her quickly before he lost his nerve, and then he'd walked out. The entire time his inner voice whispered "Coward" in a never-ending litany. He paused. Is that what he was doing, leaving rather than staying to deal with the Veruca fall-out?

Veruca. How blind he'd been. How easily he'd let her manipulate him. His wolf half had recognized hers, clouding his judgment and causing him to make the single biggest mistake of his life. He hadn't realized her murderous, manipulative intentions until it was almost too late. What an emotional rollercoaster that had been! He recalled the cold fear that shot through him when he realized that Veruca was hunting Willow. The relief when he arrived at the classroom and heard Willow's voice, then the almost immediate dread when he realized that Veruca was with her. The anger when he'd seen Veruca strike Willow and knock her into the wall. Fury had flooded him and for the first time he had welcomed his wolf. He'd killed her, but the guilt remained. Not for killing her, she'd been murderous and unstable, a notoriously bad combination. No, his guilt was all for the pain he'd caused the most important person in his life, along with a massive dose of self-loathing.

So now he was sitting in his van with his duffel bag laying haphazardly across the passenger seat where he'd tossed it only moments ago. What was he doing? Yes, he needed to get the wolf under control, but could he do it without Willow? Already he couldn't think of anything else. The thought of just one day without her made his chest tight. He loved her. And because he loved her he couldn't leave her in such pain. He couldn't run from this. He had to make it right.

Maybe it was time for another of those grand gestures.

* * *

Willow couldn't watch him walk away. She shut her eyes tightly and listened to the finality of the closing door and his retreating footsteps. Tears streamed from her eyes as she gave in to the pain and sobbed. He was gone.

Life in Sunnydale was a revolving door of ghosts, ghoulies, and things that go bump in the night. She'd played her part in bringing down all of them, confident that good would triumph and they'd pull through each time. But this was something else entirely. In the past she'd always held onto hope, the naïve belief that the good guys would always win. She was good. Oz was good. Together they were definitely of the good. But this time she didn't know what to do. This pain was going to end her, she could feel it. Willow wrapped her arms around herself, desperately trying to hold herself together while everything else she thought she knew fell apart.

Suddenly the door slammed open and Willow barely had time to let out a surprised squeak before a very determined Oz crossed the room in a few quick strides. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her, praying to every deity he could think of that she wouldn't reject him. He rejoiced when her arms wrapped around him and she returned his kiss just as forcefully. When the need for air became too great, Oz broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against hers while they clung to each other.

"I'm sorry. I love you, Willow Rosenberg. I will always love you," he whispered against her lips.

Willow pulled out of his arms as reality came crashing back. "But Veruca" she mumbled before he interrupted her.

"A mistake, Will, I swear. One that I'll regret for the rest of my life. I love you, only you." He closed his eyes in pain as Willow began shaking her head. He pulled her into his arms and buried his head against her shoulder. "I mean it. I love you. It kills me that you don't believe me. I love you. You're my world. I need you."

Willow's heart lifted slightly at his words, but there was so much hurt. She struggled with it, unsure what to do or how to handle the crushing pain. She pulled away again, gently prying his arms from her waist and leaning back so she could look into his eyes. "I believe you, Oz, I do. I just… I just don't know where that leaves us. I love you, but you hurt me. I don't know that it won't happen again." She shook her head to stop him from interrupting, before she continued. "But I think," she paused and took a deep breath, relief flooding her again that he'd come back, that they could try to fix this. "I think tonight it doesn't matter."

Oz's eyes snapped open in confusion. "What are you saying?"

Willow stepped back into his arms and felt like she was home. "I'm saying that I don't want to talk about it anymore tonight. We'll do the grown-up thing tomorrow, but for tonight it's just us. Can't we just pretend that everything is okay?"

Oz just stared at her, a small smile forming. "I said it before and I'll say it again. You are quite the human." He trailed his hand along her jaw as he brushed her hair back from her face. "I don't deserve you. I know this isn't going to be easy, but I promise you that things will be okay again. Better than okay. I'm not walking away, Will. We're going to get through this together."

"Oz?" Willow whispered as she laid a soft kiss on the side of his neck.

His eyes drifted closed as he answered, "Yeah Will?"

"You talk too much," she answered before pulling him close and kissing him.


End file.
